Ignorant Bliss

I guess that is what I would call it…Ignorant bliss. I choose to ignore what is right in front of me. But the truth is, the definition of ignorant bliss is, NOT knowing about the problem and not worriying about it. I know what the problem is!! I am just trying to do the “bliss” part.

I went for a bone marrow biopsy last week. Didn’t talk much about it… Maybe people are sick of hearing my medical crap. I guess maybe I feel if I don’t talk about these things they will disappear. I’m not that stupid, or ignorant. I just want to live one day without dealing with all of this medical shit,

I mean, give e a break…It is 6:00 in the morning and I have not slept for one single minute. I lay in bed and try to sleep but it just is not happening for me. So, what do I do at 3:00 in the morning when I’m wide awake? I take a shower, blow my hair, and then record myself reading children’s books hoping someone out there is going to enjoy them.

Ever since I left teaching I feel like I have lost my purpose in life. I was always one to try and figure out why I am here and what I am supposed to learn but for a while I lost my mojo. I had been teaching for over 18 years and now I don’t. That is it…now I don’t. I spend time at dialysis and going to doctors. That is the majority of what I do. Where is the purpose in that? Where is my purpose?

So a few weeks ago my mom started a business from home. She is selling doTerra Essential Oils, and Pampered Chef, jewelry, and UsBorne books. That is where I come in. I can’t do much but I can read books. For God’s sake, I have a masters in Reading. Let me do something that makes me feel useful.

And so at 6:11 in the morning I record myself reading because there really is nothing else to do at this hour. I could sit and get myself sick waiting for those biopsy results, but that is foolish. So I will continue to try to live in bliss, try to live my best life, and continue reading to children.

By the way, check out SCENTSible SOULutions on FaceBook!! Mom has some great products!!